School

I'm in the middle of my masters in psychology. It's wierd, tiring, sometimes interesting, mostly mind numbing. I'm bored when I'm not in school, it keeps me occupied, helps me get through the idle times. I'll do my phd in a year, then I hope I work really hard all the time and that will keep me from thinking too much. Although it's psych, you're supposed to think all the time, but at least it's not about me. I'm supposed to tell everyone else why they have the problems they have. You know the greatest minds in psychology were the most screwed up individuals in life. Sigmund Freud was coked out of his right mind.

Disillusioned

I was in love with a person who I thought was someone else. He made my heart ache it got so full, he touched me and I melted he could talk for hours and I'd hang on every word. I would have done anything for this person, anytime. I would have never lied, cheated, committed only half way I truly would have been there 100%. But he wasn't who I thought he was, he lied, he hid, he made excuses and he fell out of love with me. Maybe he was just being who he really was and maybe I was looking through rose colored glasses. The death of a great hmm I don't know, love? lust? I'm not sure, is incredibly painful, your left with a watered down relationship filled with talk that doesn't matter, it's sad. It's hard when someone looks at you and lets you know you're not enough anymore, your faults are intolerable, he no longer calls as often. He doesn't move heaven and earth to come to you anymore, the passion's gone. He doesn't say the things he used to say and he definitely doesn't want to hear the things you have to say. So you make small talk, you have sex that's not quite what it was, somethings missing, but he won't say. Disillusioned.